Practice Tips # 3: Have Your Child Be the Teacher

By far the most common question I get as a piano teacher is “how can I get my kid to practice more?” Letting your child show off what they know can be a highly effective learning tool. Ask them what they learned at their piano lesson this week and what their teacher told them to work on. Was it sitting up straight? Was it connecting notes more smoothly? Practicing slowly? Playing at a comfortable tempo as opposed to rushing? All of the above??

If your child’s teacher sends home lesson notes, make sure to go over them with your child to help them stay on top of their progress.

This conversation not only lets your child know that you’re interested in their activities but can also help you understand how to encourage your child to meet their practice goals.

Let’s explore what this might look like for various age groups.

Young beginners, ages 5-8

I often ask the parents of my young students to attend the first several lessons with me to give them a better idea of how to reinforce their child’s learning at home.

Learning piano involves a certain ceremony. There is a proper way to sit at the bench, a proper curvature of the fingers, and a proper height of the wrist and arm. Young children often grow to love this aspect of piano playing, as they are gradually initiated into the secret art of piano.

You might tell them, “show me how to sit at the piano,” or imitate incorrect behavior, such as slouching, and have them correct you.

One of the parents in my studio came up with an ingenious hand game to teach his son the names of notes. Every day, just before they got in the car on the way to school, he would hold up two fingers to symbolize the two black keys and ask his son what the names of the white keys were surrounding them (hint: C, D, and E). He would do the same trick with three fingers as well to demonstrate where to find the F, G, A, and B keys.

Finding unexpected moments to educate your child throughout the day can make all the difference in whether they remain motivated to continue an activity or not.

Intermediate players, ages 9–12

At this stage, children are becoming ready to take on more independence in their learning and enjoy assuming greater levels of responsibility. Having more independence and responsibility can also be difficult, however, as the piano repertoire becomes more challenging (often frustrating) and requires increased focus. Children of this age might also have other activities they are balancing with piano, such as sports.

Chances are, if your child has already demonstrated an aptitude for piano and enjoys playing on their own, they will be likely to continue with it. Contrary to the popular belief that pre-teens need less parental involvement, I feel that this is a critical time in children’s development when it becomes even more important to encourage them and show them you are interested in their playing.

Ask your child to tell you about what they learned in their lesson and how their teacher recommends that they practice in order to improve. Every once in a while, sit in on one of their lessons or practice sessions and ask them or the teacher to show you what they’re working on. Ask them to show you how they practice a complicated passage, for instance. Even if you know nothing about how it’s supposed to be played, praise your child’s effort to learn something so difficult.

Try listening to recordings played by a notable musician (e.g. Arthur Rubinstein) with your child or give them a CD/LP/Spotify Playlist that includes pieces they’re working on. Musical kids love musical gifts. :)

Late Intermediate and Advanced Players, ages 13+

As kids reach their teenage years, they reach another crossroads. At this point, teens are deciding for themselves whether they love an activity enough to specialize in it or let it go. If they choose to continue with piano, they will typically be highly motivated, especially if they surround themselves with others who are dedicated to the same goal.

Keep the conversation going with them about their daily activities, including piano. For example, ask them what they are doing to stay on top of their daily practice. Do they keep a practice log? Ask them to show you the last several entries and take an interest in their explanation of their practice habits. Ask them: when is that recital or competition coming up? How ready do you feel and what would it take to get there? Is there anything I can help with, such as helping you organize your study time/deadlines?

Go with your teen to concerts or surprise them with tickets to attend a concert with friends. Ask them how it went or what they liked about the performance.

Even if they don’t necessarily want to talk to you, try to get through to them. Teens are very independent as they get older, but at some point, they’ll need help and will be glad the channels of communication are still open with you.